Blood test

Went to a hospital earlier today to have my blood tested for compatibility should it be needed by my Dad.

The MedTech was cute so I felt I’d be okay. Sadly he tied a rubber band on my upper arm and then inserted a needle on a vein…It was OUCCCCHHHHH!!! it hurts like hell !!! Then he smiled at me and said “okay lang miss mas masakit pa ang kagat mg langgam!” All I can think of after that was …  Grrrrrrrrrr….that was sooo Ouch!!!!

 

 

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Ikatlong kasarian

Isang bagay na napansin ko sa aking sarili simula ng ako ay nagsimulang pumasok sa industriyang aking kinabibilangan ngayon ay mas naging bukas ang aking kaisipan sa mga bagay na aking nakakaharap sa araw-araw.

Ako ay nagmula sa isang pamilya kung saan ay may nakatakda ng papel ang bawat isa, kasama na doon ang pagiging babae o lalaki ng kahit sinong kasapi ng pamilya, walang ikat-long kasarian o anuman.

Simula ng ako ay lumisan sa aking kinalakhang pamumuhay, namulat na ako sa iusang mundo kung saan kahit sino ay malaya, malaya sa paraang kaya nilang ipahayag kung ano ang nilalaman ng kanilang mga puso at isipan, malayang ilabas ang kanilang tunay na katauhan. Bagaman ako ay nanibago at aaminin kong ako ay nabigla, ang pamumuhay na ito ay natutunan kong yakapin. At gaya ng iba pang nauna sa akin, ako ay nalasing sa kalayaang aking tinatamasa. Kalayaang alam ko ay ikakataas ng kilay ng mga taong nakalakhan ko.

Natutunan ko ring irespeto ang paniniwala at pamumuhay ng mga taong nasa paligid ko. Sa aking pinagmulan ang pagiging bakla o lesbiyana ay itinatago o kung nailalabas man ay ipinagtataas ng kilay ng mga tao na nakapaligid sa kanila, subalit sa aking buhay ngayon ay nakita ko ang kalayan ng ikatlong kasarian, nakita ko ang lungkot at saya naramdaman nila, ang kanilang paghahanap ng paraan para mailabas ang kanilang tunay na katauhan.

Sana lamang ay dumating ang panahon na matanggap sila ng buo ng mga taong nakapaligid sa kanila.

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Cracking up because of a Vowel

I was so sick earlier, that I ended up throwing up and taking meds and having one of those really painful attack of migraine.

Later after my trainor decided to talk in Tagalog as he said it is quite difficult for him to speak in our national language. Having 2 people in the group that speaks Tagalog, I admit that Filipino as I am I still have difficulty speaking in Tagalog than in bisaya, Surigaonon or even English.

Not meaning to make fun of Visayan-speaking Pinoys, but there has been a time when some people would think that even if you have a really thick Visayan accent and you speak in Tagalog , it is okay as long as you add the vowel “E” (pronounced as eh or i) after every sentence.

But this made me realize that I am a Filipino, and I need to work harder to speak in Filipino fluently, and one day, hopefully, I’d be able to write an entry here using our mother tongue.

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CHOICES

I have always met people that would ask about my age and always I would encounter people ask me why I’m unmarried until now. It does piss me off before as to why some people just can’t mind their own business and let me be. But as years passed I realized that to some people I don’t fit the norm. I don’t fit their idea of how a woman my age should be like. And that is married with kids, stay at home wife and mom, attending PTA meetings, preparing potluck picnics, preparing costumes for school affairs. But, sadly, I’m not. And Im happy this way.

No bias against people, women my age, who chose the path of blissful family life but it is not my cup of coffee (I’m  not a tea girl ^_^ ).I even admire them, as they have the capacity to put their family, husbands, kids, before themselves. I am not that unselfish, if what I am into right now is selfishness.

I have had the option to be tied down, married, previously, but I chose a different path, I love my independence too much to give it up and I am enjoying my life too much. I know in time I might think back to this day and ask myself the what ifs…but should time come that I am old and alone, I know I won’t have any regrets as I did what I wanted, and no matter what the outcome would be I’ve always made it a point not to regret any decision I have made. As it is my choice.

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First Kiss

As you mature, time comes that you suddenly have this sudden urge to reminisce about something that has happened over a decade…or decades ago. When I reached the big 3-o I began to look back on the things I’ve done when i was younger.

Today I woke up smiling. As I was staring at my reflection on the mirror in my bathroom, I remembered the girl I was, over a decade ago, and I remembered the first ever kiss I got from a boy.

I was 17 going 18 then, it was summer, I was attending a youth camp. There was this guy that was also attending the said event. This guy was someone I met when I was a freshman in high school and he was a sophomore. He was like an elder brother to me then, so it was only natural that after 4 years (since I left after my freshman year.). It was so much fun when we got together. So many things to talk about that the whole day was not enough. So the conversation continued till it was quite late in the night.

The next day this guy was up early and woke me up from the girls’ quarters. We had coffee and breakfast together. It was in a way romantic to the younger me. and it was also the last day of the event we were attending. On the last night that we spent that was when we talked together and he told me that he liked me, since my freshman year. Maybe I was just so naive then, but I believed him. And like an old sepia movie in slow motion we kissed…that kiss made my knees weak then, and seemed to me that there were butterflies in my tummy. It wasn’t a spectacular kiss, I can’t even say that he was a good kisser, but the thing is, it was my first ever kissed, yah, our nose collided as well as our teeth, but the innocence of it ,made that first ever kiss so sweet. And it never fails to make me smile…until now.

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Cravings….

Today is Thursday, the last day of my job for the week and it will be a long weekend as Friday is a non-working day since it is a holiday from where I I am working. As early as yesterday, I have been craving for different kinds of food, and I can’t even think of a reason why this is happening.

Let me count or should I say enumerate the things I am craving for :

  • Kare-kare, with spicy bagoong alamang and lots of veggies.
  • Razons’ Halo-halo.
  • Manangs’ Puto Bumbong, sapin-sapin and cuchinta in Carbon Public Market.
  • Lechon in Mambaling.
  • Cheese Rolls.
  • Chocolate cake.
  • My Moms’ Biko.
  • Sisig.
  • Sinugbang Panga that has been covered in sugar and black pepper.
  • Carbonara and pizza.

How about you? What are you craving for?

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Of Blue Panties with Pink Flowers….

Got a test message from 2 male friends, and both messages contain the same thought…Both of this male friends got into a misfortune of seeing a womans’ underwear.

While most of us females would think that men are beasts that are always in the lookout for the next underwear exposure, the thing is this can happen usually during their adolescence. But this situation made me think. Men are not the underwear hungry peekers…always…though if you ask me if the girl is peek-worthy why not? But, these two guys were like “No way…this girl that kept on flashing her undies is like “Ewwww!!!thanks but no thanks….” As my friends say it made her appear low class. And I got into thinking…”wow there is a classy a a non-classy underwear flasher.

To most girls, just a piece of advice, I am also a girl and I know that we so love wearing mini skirts, short dresses and shorts, let’s just be very careful and work on how we should handle it….and another thing, should we wear short akirts, let’s make sure that we are wearing cute panties that don’t shout “garbage!!!”.

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Razons’ Halo-halo and Palabok

Yesterday I was like feeling really lazy and just wanna stay in bed…it was a cold, wet morning and staying in bed the whole morning is the most inviting thing in the world….

But no….I have to get up, take a cold bath and be ready for work by 8:30 am as i have to leave by 9 a.m. to arrive at work before 10 a.m.. So, like any other day I dragged myself to go to the ground floor and take that dreaded cooooold bath.

I went to work…feeling sick and on the verge of throwing up. So, before the afternon ended I developed fever….. During my technical training class, I fell asleep….and my trainor noticed it. So, I woke up finally, and said that I took 2 ibuprofen tablets earlier.

Finally, 7:00 p.m. I’m off from work, had a dinner date with my Boo, we went to Razons’ for halo-halo and palabok. Which by the way I really love! Just imagine the smile on my face when the food server served my halo-halo with extra Minatamis na langka and Halayang Ube… The thing with the Razon halo-halo is that it is not the common halo-halo that you  get to buy from other restaurants with all the sweet beans, sago, gulaman, nata de coco,leche flan, halayang uba, sweet bananas, buco shreds, shaved ice and milk, some people even add pinipig. Razons’ have this halo-halo that is not as colorful as the usual ones you see which would always make me smile as they are very colorful and never fail to remind me of christmas. Razon halo-halo has this clean look in it, a thing that makes people doubt its’ taste, but, when you start to dig into it, when you start to mix the ice, milk, sweet langka, macapuno, and leche flan, then you can see the difference, it is very creamy, and yummy and you can feel the creaminess linger in your mouth. There is also the the Palabok, the smell of the sauce is enough to make my mouth water…it smells like shrimps!!!the way palabok should be, should I say more?

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Stoned….

I left home early today, as I have a job interview set at 9:00 a.m. It was drizzling when I went out to get a ride. After the Interview  I was told to be back tomorow at 2:00 p.m., for another set of interview.

Today seems to be boring… I’ve ran out of Dvds’ and I’m not in the mood to go out and socialize… I also am not in the mood to answer text messages. So, what I did after getting home is I cooked hotdogs for my lunch…ate in ftont of my PC….then started playing with my two kittens.

I wish tomorrow would be more eventful…. hopefully….

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I remember the BOY…. (but I don’t remember the feelings…. )

Browsing through “youtube” on a lazy day like today…I came across another version of a song that would make me smile… It was the song by Leach Salonga titled I Remember the Boy, only this time it was sung by Christian Bautista and now aptly titled “I Remember the Girl”

Why this song would make me smile is a story that happened 18 years ago… and until now whenever I remember it , a smile could form on my lips…

I met a tall, lanky boy when I was 10 and he was 11…yah, quite young… I was a transferee and he is a resident o the school where I moved to. He has this easy smile and friendliness about him…

When I was 12 we became more than friends, but since we were young, when his mom found out about us she was so angry….. and so was my mom. So I concentrated on my studies and we ignored each other, which was hard to do as his sister is my friend and we had the same bus service to school. Eventually , I got a scholarship and I had to leave our province, I can only go home on school breaks. As the years passed by, we matured. We both tried to make it work, but still, his Mom won’t approve of me , saying my family is not rich enough for them. But even in secret he would try to reach out to me…communicate with me. Until I grew out of it. He was married to a girl from another province who happens to be an only daughter of a family that owns a business, they said the girl was pregnant but the baby came after 3 years.

I went home in ’06 for the wedding of my uncle, my moms’ brother that is. His parents were the godparents of my uncle for the wedding. I saw him. He went straight to me and offered his hand for a handshake and asked me how I was. We talked, and like a soap opera plot, I knew the story, news had it that I got pregnant and the had a kid without a dad, and that I became an old man’s mistress! I laughed…what else can I do? I never had a kid, nor an old benefactor…but as they say in the province, when you are not seen they are free to speculate.

His wife was looking at us and started acting crazy, I decided to distance myself from him. He would try to call me after that event, I decided to change my number and never went home to the province.

And now, whenever I hear this song…I can’t help but sing along the part that says…”I remember the boy…but I don’t remember the feelings…..anymore…..

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